Empathy in Action: See the World Through Their Eyes

"Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view." - Dale Carnegie

Introduction:

Ever felt like you’re speaking to a brick wall? We’ve all been there—trying to get our point across, but it’s like the other person just doesn’t get it. What if the secret isn’t about making them see your side, but truly understanding theirs?

It’s easy to dismiss or argue with someone when they seem wrong, but when you pause and try to see things from their perspective, something magical happens.

Imagine unlocking the reason behind their actions, gaining a whole new level of understanding that makes collaboration and agreement feel effortless. What’s the real key to making this happen? It’s empathy.

Explanation:

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings, thoughts, and perspectives of others. It involves recognizing and appreciating what someone else is experiencing, emotionally or mentally, and responding with care and compassion.

Empathy isn’t just about feeling sorry for someone; it's about truly putting yourself in their shoes. When you see the world through another person’s eyes, you’re more likely to connect on a human level.

It’s this connection that can transform a simple conversation into a meaningful exchange, breaking down walls and building bridges. Understanding doesn’t mean agreeing with everything, but it opens up the possibility of finding common ground, even when disagreements arise.

"Remember that other people may be totally wrong. But they don’t think so." - Dale Carnegie

It’s easy to label someone as wrong, but it’s much harder—and far more rewarding—to understand why they think the way they do. Everyone has a reason for their beliefs, shaped by their experiences, values, and perceptions.

To them, their viewpoint is just as valid as yours. By acknowledging this, you’re not just being polite; you’re actively working to reduce friction and open up space for genuine dialogue.

It takes wisdom and patience to step back from judgment. Anyone can criticize, but it takes a special kind of person to look beyond the surface and ask, “Why does this person feel this way?” It’s not about letting go of your own stance, but about holding space for theirs too. The real power lies in not dismissing others, but in valuing their humanity enough to understand their viewpoint.

There is a reason why the other man thinks and acts as he does. Try honestly to put yourself in his place. The moment you start to uncover the reasons behind someone’s actions, you gain insight not only into their behavior but into who they are as a person.

Understanding doesn’t require agreement, but it does require effort. It’s about digging deeper, asking questions, and listening—really listening—to the answers. This is how you find the key to their actions, and maybe even a piece of their personality puzzle.

The Office Project:

Lisa hurried through the office doors, juggling her laptop, a notepad, and her phone. She was running late for a team meeting, the third one that week, and today they were finalizing the project plan for a major client. As the project manager, Lisa felt the weight of responsibility on her shoulders. Everything needed to be perfect—no delays, no errors.

When she entered the conference room, her team was already seated. There was Mark, the software engineer who always seemed to find bugs at the last minute; Priya, the marketing strategist who could pitch ideas all day but struggled with timelines; and Sam, the junior designer who was new and often overwhelmed. Lisa noticed everyone seemed a bit tense, especially as today’s meeting was critical.

“Alright, let’s dive in,” Lisa said, trying to project confidence. “We need to finalize the timeline and get everyone aligned on their tasks. The client presentation is next week, and we’re behind schedule.”

The meeting started off smoothly, but it wasn’t long before disagreements began to surface. Mark was concerned about the feasibility of a feature Priya wanted to add. Priya argued it was essential for the client’s brand image. Sam, meanwhile, was struggling to keep up, staring down at his notes and not saying much.

Lisa’s patience was thinning. She felt her stress rising as the team went back and forth, each person firmly rooted in their own perspective. The clock was ticking, and they needed a solution. But every suggestion seemed to clash with someone else’s idea.

“Can we just stick to the original plan?” Lisa finally snapped, her voice sharper than she intended. “We’re running out of time for changes.”

Mark and Priya fell silent, exchanging glances. Sam looked even more uncomfortable, and Lisa could sense the morale dropping. She knew she needed to find a way to bring everyone back on track, but the tension in the room was palpable.

That evening, Lisa sat at her desk, going over the meeting notes. Frustration gnawed at her. She replayed the arguments in her head, annoyed that her team couldn’t just see things her way and get on with it. She had been trying so hard to keep everything together, and it felt like no one understood the pressure she was under.

Just then, a message popped up on her screen. It was an email from Sam.

“Hi Lisa, I just wanted to apologize if I seemed off today. I’m trying my best to keep up, but I’m feeling a bit lost with all the changes. I’m still learning, and I really want to contribute more effectively to the team.”

Lisa leaned back in her chair, Sam’s words lingering in her mind. She hadn’t considered how overwhelming the project might be for him. He was new, after all, and trying to find his footing in a fast-paced environment.

Lisa thought back to the meeting: Mark, who always seemed to question everything, was probably just trying to ensure the product worked flawlessly. Priya, with her enthusiasm for new ideas, wasn’t just being difficult—she was passionate about creating the best outcome for the client. Everyone was coming from their own place of care and concern, just as she was. They weren’t obstacles; they were just people, doing their best with their own set of challenges and priorities.

The next morning, Lisa decided to approach things differently. She called a quick meeting but this time, her approach was softer.

“Before we dive in, I just want to say that I appreciate how much effort everyone is putting into this project,” Lisa began. “I realized that I’ve been so focused on the deadlines and deliverables that I haven’t stopped to consider each of your perspectives. I know we all have the same goal, even if we see different paths to get there.”

Mark spoke up first. “I’m sorry if I seemed difficult. I just want to make sure we’re delivering something that works perfectly, and I get caught up in the technical details.”

“And I know I push for a lot of changes,” Priya added. “I just get excited about making sure our work really stands out, but I’ll try to be more mindful of the timeline.”

Sam nodded, looking relieved. “Thanks for saying that, Lisa. I really want to contribute better. I just need a bit more guidance on how I can help.”

With that, the atmosphere shifted. It wasn’t that the challenges disappeared, but suddenly the team felt more cohesive, more willing to see things from each other’s point of view. They spent the rest of the meeting going over everyone’s concerns, finding compromises that addressed key issues without derailing the project timeline.

They didn’t just push through their own ideas; they paused, asked questions, and tried to understand why each person felt the way they did. Mark, who was usually skeptical of new features, offered to help Priya refine her idea in a way that made the feature easier to implement. Priya, in turn, committed to narrowing down her suggestions to the most impactful changes.

Lisa also took a moment to coach Sam directly, explaining each part of the process and how his designs fit into the bigger picture. It was clear that his confidence grew with the additional context, and he even started offering creative suggestions of his own.

In the end, the team didn’t just meet their deadline—they exceeded expectations. The client presentation went smoothly, and the project was received with enthusiasm. The work was polished, innovative, and most importantly, a true reflection of the combined efforts and talents of everyone involved.

As they celebrated their success, Lisa reflected on the journey. She realized that empathy wasn’t just about listening to someone vent or sharing kind words. It was about truly stepping into their shoes, understanding their motivations, and responding with that knowledge in mind.

By asking questions like, “How do you see this?” and “What’s important to you here?” Lisa discovered that she could unlock a new level of collaboration within her team. It wasn’t just about avoiding conflict; it was about enriching their work with a diversity of thought and a deeper respect for one another’s contributions.

From that point forward, Lisa made it a point to engage her team with empathy at every step. She asked more about their ideas, considered their backgrounds, and validated their feelings—even if she didn’t always agree. This approach didn’t just make her a better manager; it made her a better teammate, one who could inspire her colleagues to see beyond their immediate frustrations and focus on the bigger picture.

Through this experience, Lisa learned that seeing things from another person’s point of view and practicing empathy weren’t just good things—they were essential for creating a supportive, productive, and successful work environment. And in the process, she realized that sometimes, the best way to lead is simply to listen.

Tips:

Here are some practical tips that can make empathy a more natural part of your conversations.

1. Ask About Their Perspective

A great starting point is to simply ask about the other person's perspective. It might seem basic, but questions like, “How do you see this?” or “What’s important to you in this situation?” can open up new avenues of understanding. These questions do more than just gather information—they signal to the other person that you genuinely care about their thoughts and feelings. They’re not just words; they’re invitations to deeper, more meaningful dialogue.

2. Consider Their Background and Motivations

We all carry our own baggage—past experiences, personal fears, and individual aspirations. These invisible factors can heavily influence how someone responds to a situation. When you encounter a behavior that puzzles or frustrates you, pause and ask yourself, “What past experiences might be shaping their actions now?” This question isn’t about excusing poor behavior but about trying to see the world from their vantage point. Recognizing that everyone’s actions are influenced by their personal history can help you approach the situation with more compassion and less judgment.

3. Validate Their Feelings

One of the simplest yet most impactful ways to show empathy is to validate the other person’s feelings. You don’t have to agree with their perspective to acknowledge that their emotions are real and valid. Phrases like “I can see why you feel that way” or “That sounds really challenging” can make a world of difference. When people feel heard and respected, they’re more likely to open up and engage in a productive dialogue, even if there are disagreements.

4. Simulate Their Experience

Before you react or respond, take a moment to mentally step into their shoes. Ask yourself, “How would I feel if I were in their position?” This mental exercise isn’t just about imagining their situation; it’s about feeling it, too. By simulating their experience, you shift from a space of judgment to one of understanding. This can ease any irritation you might feel and instead, increase your empathy and patience.

5. Suspend Your Judgment

It’s human nature to form quick opinions, especially when someone’s actions or words clash with your own beliefs. However, empathy requires us to suspend that initial judgment and dig deeper. Instead of immediately labeling their actions as wrong or misguided, try to think of possible reasons why they believe they’re right. This approach isn’t about condoning every action but about cultivating a more open and tolerant mindset. Remember, understanding someone’s reasoning doesn’t mean you have to agree with it—it just means you respect their humanity enough to consider their point of view.

6. Engage in Reflective Listening

Reflective listening is a powerful tool in any empathetic interaction. This means not just hearing what the other person says but also reflecting it back in your own words. For instance, if someone shares a frustration with you, you might respond with, “So, what I’m hearing is that you’re feeling really overwhelmed because…” This shows that you’re actively engaged in the conversation and that you value their perspective. It’s a small but powerful way to let them know that you’re not just listening—you’re truly trying to understand.

7. Use Empathy Prompts

Empathy doesn’t always come naturally, especially in high-stress situations. That’s where empathy prompts can be a helpful reminder. Simple mental cues like, “What might they be worried about?” or “What’s important to them right now?” can help center your thoughts on the other person’s perspective rather than your immediate reaction. These prompts act like a mental reset button, helping you refocus on what truly matters in the interaction: connection and understanding.

8. Practice Active Empathy

Empathy is more than just a passive feeling; it’s an active process. This means going beyond just nodding along or offering surface-level comments. Engage deeply with what the other person is saying. Reflect back their thoughts and feelings, and ask follow-up questions that show you’re truly paying attention. This active engagement not only strengthens your empathy but also demonstrates to the other person that their experience matters to you.

9. Ask Open-Ended Questions

If you want to dig deeper and gain a fuller understanding of someone’s perspective, open-ended questions are your best friend. Instead of asking yes-or-no questions, opt for ones that invite more elaborate responses, such as “Can you tell me more about what you’re feeling?” or “What led you to that conclusion?” Open-ended questions show that you’re not just looking for a quick answer—you’re interested in the full story. This not only enriches the conversation but also demonstrates a genuine curiosity and respect for the other person’s viewpoint.

Conclusion:

Empathy is more than a nice-to-have; it’s a superpower that can transform your interactions. When we take the time to understand where others are coming from, we open the door to collaboration, reduce resistance, and build stronger, more meaningful connections. It’s not about giving up your way of thinking, but about finding a path forward that respects both sides.

Trying to see things from another person’s point of view can transform your interactions and deepen your connections. It’s a practice that requires patience, curiosity, and a willingness to step outside of your own narrative. But the rewards are immense—more harmonious relationships, less conflict, and a greater ability to influence and inspire those around you. Remember, every person you meet is dealing with their own struggles and sees the world through a unique lens.

References

1. "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, 1936

2. Some images involve AI technology.

This article is part of the "Positive Workplace Culture" series.